Quick sip: Lowkey losing it
Just the cosmos' ultimate a**hole entering Gemini
Paradigms are shifting. The zeitgeist is having a reshape. Something major is brewing for the first time in 84 years, and guess who felt it first? Rih’s baby daddy. But don’t expect A$AP Rocky to lead the revolution. If a rebellion’s coming, he’s already packed his Louis bag, slipped into his ballet flats and booked a one-way to Rihanna’s Bajan hideout with his boys. He’s not fighting the power, he’s moisturised, accessorised and on parental leave.
Verity: *Spits out tea.
V: Right, so, the cultural tides are turning because Anna’s stepping back from her editorial duties at Vogue. F*cking, finally. Basically, passing off duties until…
Kholi: …she reunites with André. Though, I’m not sure he’d save her a seat. Does mortal beef make it past the pearly gates?
V: Who said she’s headed upstairs?
K: Anyway, Condé’s ad on LinkedIn was unusual. No description, no requirements. Just a “we’re hiring” and an email. Big ‘IYKYK’ energy.
K: Chloe Malle is the obvious top candidate. Safe and easy to overlook. If you’ve listened to her Vogue podcast with Chioma, you know what I mean. It’s mostly unseasoned fashion chit-chat, spoon-feeding headlines to an audience they assume doesn’t like to read.
V: A small part of me considered applying for the role, just to test the waters. Must be the Demna effect.
K: Do you know what I am curious about? Edward Enninful’s new project, especially now that he’s hired British Vogue’s fashion director, Julia Sarr-Jamois. After spotting him at the Snooze-os wedding, I couldn’t help but wonder if he was there lining up funds for his magazine. Tragic. Still, I’ve got hope. He’s always been a risk-taker. This new fashion venture of his might actually pop off.
SPEAKING OF…
☕️ CELINE. Michael Rider’s debut was a blessed break from Hedi’s fever dream period. Unmistakably French with a whisper of American edge, which makes sense, considering he was at Ralph Lauren from 2018 before landing the gig. The accessories (!!!) were straight-up Philo-isms. Turns out he worked under Phoebe Philo at Céline. (Of course he did.) Lose the loud logos and this would’ve been an A+++ collection.
☕️ Poor posture’s in at Schiaparelli, and red is the moment. She’s bold, she’s brazen, she’s THAT girl. Still, as 1Granary noted (post since deleted), when a house leans heavily on legacy and spectacle, even the most beautiful work can begin to feel like a one-trick pony.
☕️ Nigerian label Orange Culture’s presentation at Berlin Fashion week was a vibe. So many exquisite pieces. Also, can we just say we’re kinda gagged by Berlin stepping up to rival London Fashion Week. Good for her. We thought she was done before she even began, and now look.
☕️ South Africa just hosted its annual Durban July, the premier horse racing event where the rich and famous roll up in outfits that, honestly, do more harm than good. Horses are delicate creatures and get spooked by loud, chaotic disasters masquerading as fashion. This year’s theme was Marvels of Mzansi, and only a few girls actually delivered. (Emphasis on only.)
Influencer Sarah Langa was a standout, serving the Mzansi edition of superfine black tailoring with a Balmain-level moment that honoured the Skhothane. Tyla, sweetie, take notes for the next Met Gala. The girls need some real traditional references, please!
☕️ Some rich folk bet on horses. Others throw away cash in Monaco, the trashiest playground for the stingiest souls alive. Not even worth eating. They’ve already ruined themselves. One scroll through the Pistons Brothers page says it all. Case in point.
☕️ Back to tasteful things. We cannot get over the Dior tassel bags from Jonathan’s debut menswear collection, created in collaboration with textile artist Sheila Hicks. This TikToker does a superb breakdown of how Hicks developed different woven fabrics from around the globe, drawing inspiration from Mexico to Morocco and beyond. A must-watch.
☕️ The Row’s SS26 collection and campaign is f*cking effortless as per. Their creative strategist knows exactly what they’re doing. It’s always an art-first approach, one that separates them from Khaite, Toteme, and the like.
☕️ Bella Freud’s latest chat with Alessandro Michele is full of gems. From his obsession with advertising what he loves, like his home (more tea on the house tour), to finding beauty in the intimate ritual of using the toilet. Only this diva could make that feel poetic.
☕️ Charlotte Olympia showed up to her birthday dressed as a banana. Iconic.
Think Carmen Miranda meets English countryside: fruit, sequins, sailors - pure tropical surrealism 🍌